i miss him so much my heart still aches each night. there isn't a day that goes by that i don't think about him. truly it is the hardest thing i have had to go through yet. he was such a good dog and i wonder if we will ever have another one as special as he was.
i hate debt. that being said i do a terrific job of being in it! i just set up payments for 2 cards for the next 11 months. they will both be paid off by then. i have cut them up and will no longer use them. why i got them in the first place - this is much deeper than i feel the need to go in to here. lets just say they got me to colorado more than once and they allowed me to fly mary out here one year and fly ruthie out here one year. so while they served a purpose, life would have been just as sweet had i never had them. this is where roger and i differ - i had major money issues when we got married and he is a total saver. i drowned my sorrows not in chocolate cake, ut in the target aisles...the base of many fights during our marraige.
over sharing...
i took some photos of miss ginger. they turned out looking a little artsy becaus they wer ein the dark, but i like them
I have gotten nothing accomplished in the past 3 days...except the payoff thing. i need to clean...badly. good thing i have 1/2 day on friday off and that mary doesn't get here until late saturday. and i'm off all week next week.
i think one of THESE BABIES is going to come live with me this week (maybe...i still have to decide if it's something i really want)
i am so tired. i jus can barely function and yet there is so much to do. i am going to bed soon - it's 6:30 now and my guess is i'm sleeping by 8.
here is a pic of ginger and the back of ruth's head. ginger semed so cold on sunday - so i wrapped her in a blankie while we set things up.
so - I struggle a lot...with many things. i arrived at work on friday in a struggle...nothing new. my co-worker called me in to her office and played me this video (warning: if you haven't seen it before - get tissue now).
in the midst of my struggles there is always a soundtrack that plays...of course...i don't do much of anything without music playing a part!
i am painting the new office today. almost done with one wall - i call it chocolate pudding!! the other walls will be a steel blue. very cozy. the new guest room will be a very dark plum and a very light sageish green. i'm going to take the plum and do some flourishes on the green walls. at least that's the plan. whoknows when that oom will get done...one at a time!!!
is much the same.
still dealing with pain and figuring out what normal is and how we move forward from here.
coming home from work daily i dread what i will find in the house. mostly because ginger is so naughty and distros anything she can find...anything but her own toys! she wants to be friends so badly with oj...this is what results!
