Posts (page 2)
i hate debt. that being said i do a terrific job of being in it! i just set up payments for 2 cards for the next 11 months. they will both be paid off by then. i have cut them up and will no longer use them. why i got them in the first place - this is much deeper than i feel the need to go in to here. lets just say they got me to colorado more than once and they allowed me to fly mary out here one year and fly ruthie out here one year. so while they served a purpose, life would have been just as sweet had i never had them. this is where roger and i differ - i had major money issues when we got married and he is a total saver. i drowned my sorrows not in chocolate cake, ut in the target aisles...the base of many fights during our marraige.
over sharing...
i took some photos of miss ginger. they turned out looking a little artsy becaus they wer ein the dark, but i like them
I have gotten nothing accomplished in the past 3 days...except the payoff thing. i need to clean...badly. good thing i have 1/2 day on friday off and that mary doesn't get here until late saturday. and i'm off all week next week.
i think one of THESE BABIES is going to come live with me this week (maybe...i still have to decide if it's something i really want)
i am so tired. i jus can barely function and yet there is so much to do. i am going to bed soon - it's 6:30 now and my guess is i'm sleeping by 8.
here is a pic of ginger and the back of ruth's head. ginger semed so cold on sunday - so i wrapped her in a blankie while we set things up.
so - I struggle a lot...with many things. i arrived at work on friday in a struggle...nothing new. my co-worker called me in to her office and played me this video (warning: if you haven't seen it before - get tissue now).
in the midst of my struggles there is always a soundtrack that plays...of course...i don't do much of anything without music playing a part!
i am painting the new office today. almost done with one wall - i call it chocolate pudding!! the other walls will be a steel blue. very cozy. the new guest room will be a very dark plum and a very light sageish green. i'm going to take the plum and do some flourishes on the green walls. at least that's the plan. whoknows when that oom will get done...one at a time!!!
is much the same.
still dealing with pain and figuring out what normal is and how we move forward from here.
coming home from work daily i dread what i will find in the house. mostly because ginger is so naughty and distros anything she can find...anything but her own toys! she wants to be friends so badly with oj...this is what results!
i had my injection. it was um, uncomfortable to say the least. they threaded the needle from under my collar bone and then in to my lower neck. and yes, it felt just like it sounds!
i have relief - just not full. i would say my pain level is 40% less than it was. i do believe that i might be the 1 out of 3 who will not have a successful turnout.
next - pt, massage and accupuncture.
life is crazy busy.
here is a picture of the baby
a co-worker brought her 3 week old in today. there is nothing like the smell of the head of a newborn infant. mmmm. she was beautiful. of course, being the mom and future grandmother that i am, i had to hold her. i only manage less than 5 minutes with her pink little beauty in my arms before my shoulder was screaming. i was bummed. i had to give her back.
i miss my friend in vegas. talked to her today and told her i just hate that we are far apart!
i am counting the minutes until tuesday - although i have a very demanding group at work and they are demanding that i work on saturday and sunday! i hate this group. don't get me wrong, i'm getting ore than just overtime for this - but i would rather not work the weekend before my week's vacation.
i think a full time admin position might open at the resort soon. just an fyi.
before i get in to the politics i will touch on the pain. i had my nerve test today - omg!! ouch. electric shocks to make your hands twitch and your arms jump...then needles in to different muscles in the arm and neck. i do have a pinched nerve and will go i for a c-spine epidural injection on the 16th. it requires an operating room and lots of happy drugs!!
now the politics. i will not apologize for being a republican and posting on MY blog the things i want t to post about the political race. the following are a few things that i have found interesting via emails.
i had pt today. it was HELL. i knew that my shoulder had gotten worse - but i didn't really know how much worse until i went to see my physical therapist, nancy, today. i told her about me feeling like it was worse and what i could and couldn't do now without pain. she said that today we were going to do ultrasound, lite massage and TENS. the ultra sound nearly sent me through the roof at the beginning. when he first started and was running the thing on the curve of my neck my whole arm was tingling. then it went away. then the massage...she was going so light and i was still having areas that were giving me fits. then she hooked up the tens machine and turned up the electricity. that is a weird feeling!
i go see the doc on wednesday an have a list from the pt to give to him. i think my breaking down in tears gave her a clue to the stress that this pain was now causing. i am having a really hard time sleeping because i can't get comfortable. it sucks.
i don't want rain tomorrow. you can't have a good pool party with rain.
busy day tomorrow and i have no clue how i'm going to do it all.
i just got back fom havng drinks with friends at armitage. it was pretty good. obviouly a place that you go when you make good money as there isn't a lot of 1/2 pricced anythings that make it worth while. it was fun though. roger is at kon tiki celebrating a work buddy's birthday or something. i hope he plans on mowing the grass tomorrow...and going shopping with me - otherwise...PJ....WHERE ARE YOU!!!??? it sucks not being able to lift things - and at this point i can't even 'fudgeand pay for it later...i have no strength to lift with my left arm!
Ginger is doing well...she can be so sweet. it will be interesting to see how she does with lots of strangers tomorrow. it will seem strange to have a gathering without my big red boy.
i'm here.
it takes a lot to sit and do anything at the computer. quite honestly i don't know how i am working - my pain level on most days hovers near a 9 (on a scale from 1-10). i'm sure sme people think i'm exhagerating - i'm not. most days i am on the verge of puking due to the pain. i just want an answer.
i have a nerve test a week from today. needles and electrical current - fun...fun...
let me draw you a picture:
sit or lay on your arm until it falls asleep - not just a little...but to the point where the tingles are really bad.
now, go slam your funny bone in to something really hard - you know that feeling
now, pretend there is something under your shoulder blade the size of a tangerine- a tangerine that suddenly convulses at random times of the day making the above two feelings increase in intenstity along with the muscle pain. oh, and with the convulsions you often wonder if your arm is going to suddenly shoot up in the air with one of the spasms!!
yep - that's the picture i can draw for you.
it's constant and never really goes away unless i am so drugged up i'm knocked out. i have even had to learn to sleep a new way because i can't lay on my left side or put any real pressure on that shoulder blade. guess what? i'm a left side sleeper and when that doesn't work i sleep on my back!! not so much anymore!!
i want to feel better.
on a bright note - weight loss is occurring...even pj noticed - and that says a lot since i'm just mom and not a lot about mom gets noticed!!
friday is full - 1/2 day of work, office lunch at chic-fil-a, physical therapy, drinks with work peeps at la encantada. then saturday party.
blessings
st@cy
